"Be GRUDGE-free"
"Resentment or grudges do no harm to the person against whom you hold these feelings, but every day and every night of your life, they are eating at you."
Norman Vincent Peale
Grudge is defined as being resentful, a persistent feeling or ill will resulting in a past insult or injury. When someone you care about hurts you, you can hold on to anger, resentment and thoughts of revenge – or chose to embark upon forgiveness & move forward.
When someone you trust and love hurts you, you become angry, sad or confused and it is okay to have those initial feelings, we are only human. However, when we dwell over and over, play out the event multiple times and allow those negative feelings to take root, we end up with bitterness. Bitterness settles down for hibernation and slowly forms into a grudge.
To carry a grudge simply means you pin your built up bitterness on the outside and you walk around with a big comment box over your head that says "Grudge Holder." This merely shows others that you are unable to forgive, unable to rise above and unable to move forward. Are you "unable" or just "unwilling?"
Don't grumble against one another, brothers and sisters or you will be judged. The Judge is standing at the door!
If you are surrounded by negative people you have witnessed a grudge first hand. Family & friends are the leading ones to carry grudges and acts of un-forgiveness. See, they know all about you. They see you on a more frequent basis than most of your acquaintances do and they see your ups and downs. They form a mindset of who you are, how you handle things, what is most important in your life and how much you do for them. Sounds a little harsh, you bet it is!!
A grudge is not something someone can see, it is something we carry deep within ourselves, but it is such a heavy burden that it manifests itself outward in our actions towards others physically and mentally. Although a grudge is not tangible, it can grow and become bigger and bigger and in time it could completely consume our lives.
Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against anyone among your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.
When we accept Jesus Christ as our Lord & Savior we have to let our old self die to wash away our old sinful habits. People see you one day as a sinful person and the next day you are born again, but to them you look the same today as you did yesterday. This to some can be a shock. They see you as no different, they don't know how you have changed on the inside, what your heart is now reflecting. Once this transformation takes place it will take time through your actions, how you handle situations, how you let strife go instead of battling your critics. You put on your protecting armor and you are now forgivable & free from a life where the wages of sin is death.
Now the Berean Jews were of more noble character than those in Thessalonica, for they received the message with great eagerness and examined the Scriptures every day to see if what Paul said was true.
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in[a] Christ Jesus our Lord.
- It's not a sinners fault for not accepting the new you; it's just not in their vision yet.
- It's not a sinners fault they cannot see the change in you for they cannot see change as an option for them.
- It's not a sinner's fault that they think of you as being a fraud; they haven't met the God that can heal all.
- It's not a sinner's fault that they doubt; they haven't given God a chance to perform a miracle.
This means we are different and we will NOT resemble the person that you remember. We are born again. Our focus from that point on is to reflect an image of Christ in everything we say or do and that can be extremely difficult at times. God will not forsake us!!
Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you
Your family, friends, coworkers & strangers may forsake you because the new you is scary and very different from what they would expect of you. The new you can be a constant reminder of where they feel, deep inside they should be, but have not taken that first step. They don't hate you, but they are confused. Instead of embracing the new you and learning to love the new you, discarding the old and see the miraculous wonders of your new image, they call you names & shun you. They turn away and call you a hypocrite. Yes, we probably do resemble a hypocrite because we were once one way and now we are another, but that is by God's grace not our own. We are marvelous in our new appearance and God is pleased.
The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?
We are NO LONGER a slave to sin, that means we can repent, ask for forgiveness and God will grant it. Now this does NOT mean you can go out and rob a bank Donna!!! (haha) When we start to understand the changes that our bodies physically and mentally go through we see that we have basically taken the old me and replaced it with the new me. Now what if those around the old me have not accepted Christ as their Lord & Savior and all of a sudden I come bouncing back as a new me, they will shun me. I am different, I am no longer considered fun, and I am honest. I am no longer considered daring, I am reliable. I am not longer considered lost, I am found. They will walk away from you because you have changed and until they change you may feel alone.
ALRIGHT STOP/TIMEOUT!!!!!
When you are judged for changing & become alone, it will be very easy for you to start holding a grudge against those that loved you yesterday and disown you today, but look what the Bible says in Ephesians 4:31, "Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice." Get rid of the old ways of doing things.
- Do not repay evil for evil (1 Peter 3:9)
- Rid yourselves of anger, rage, malice, slander & filthy language. (Colossians 3:8
- Don't lie (Colossians 3:9)
- Throw off everything that hinders & the sin that so easily entangles us (Hebrews 12:1)
- Get rid of moral filth & evil doings (James 1:21)
- Rid yourself of hypocrisy & envy. (1 Peter 2:1)
Unsaved People:
- Will not understand the new you
- Will judge your actions
- Will condemn you for saying you are different
- Will slander you
- Will cause you suffering
- Will not admit they are a little eager to learn more about the new you.
- Will say you are weird.
- Will cast stones
- Will run from you
- Will avoid you like the plague
- Will Shun you
- Will speak about you to others as if you have a disease
- Will NOT like the new you
Unsaved people have a hard time seeing the beauty in being washed clean in the blood of Jesus Christ. Until they make it to that point they will not connect and understand the new you.
So do not become offended when they turn on you, call you names, say you are a liar, you look like one to them. Call you a hypocrite, you may resemble one. Call you weird, you're different. It's okay, don't expect too much out of them. Until they are saved and practice a full time Christian attitude, there is not a thing that you can say or do to convince them that the new you is absolutely amazing and that God is the result of it all.
The hardest thing for a non-practicing Christian to see is "change." They cannot see change as God's will, or anything that reflects a positive image in their eye. To them change is you being one way with them and totally different with everyone else. They simply need to give the new you a chance.
Holding grudges separates us from the will of God. When we hold a grudge we tell God that we are still in control by not releasing the pain to Him. When you release the pain you let it go completely. Let God have the pain that you are feeling, don't develop a grudge. If the person has no idea the way you feel and all you do is harbor it deep within yourself, you are only hurting yourself. It doesn't affect the other person at all so LET IT GO! Even if you have all the evidence that says that person was one hundred percent wrong, it does not matter. LET IT GO! It is not worth losing your joy over something you could not control and cannot control the outcome. LET IT GO! Don't harbor it deep down, saying you are letting it go, really let it go and don't think about it again.
For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin—
Pray for those that don't believe in you, pray for those that don't know any better, pray for those that act upon their feelings rather than God's will. Remember you are no better than your brother or sister in Christ.
- Let your heart ache for the lost
- Let your words speak love & kindness
- Let your actions reveal healing & forgiveness
- Let your image of Christ be visible to all
Give them extra love, we can all use daily doses of love & support without expectations.
A little boy went to a farm to pick out a new puppy. All the puppies started running towards the little boy. There was one puppy that was limping behind the group. The little boy looked up at the farmer and said, "I want that puppy in the back." The farmer looked at the little boy and said, "Son you don't want that puppy he won't ever run fast, he is slow. "The little boy leaned down and pulled up both pants legs and revealed braces on each leg. He told the farmer, "you see I struggle every single day and I'll never run fast either, this puppy is going to need someone who understands and loves him."
Pretend today as you walk around showing the image of Christ in all you say & do, that you are a in a China shop. Make no sudden movements, or talk to loud, be very gentle and make sure that your heart is as clear as those glasses. Let people around you see straight to your heart. Don't have smudges that merely reflect the grudges that you hold. Clean your glass & see all the beauty that God has to offer to you & those that may not know Him yet.
In all things, great and small, God loves us all,
Kylie Davis Note:
Views, Opinions, Prayer/Praise Request,
Email: dentedbucket@charter.net or kylie.davis@charter.net
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